we leave tomorrow!

we are ready to go. i already miss my Monkey and we haven't even left yet. there were a few topics i wanted to go over this week but every time i thought of one, i didn't write it down and now i've forgotten.

i do remember one was to talk about how my little explorer is moving around a lot more now. he's figuring out the mechanics of sliding doors... clapping and dancing along with music (so cute when he does that)... saying mamamamama... and taking a lot more steps!

this weekend the Monkey will be breaking up his time between the grandma's. two nites with Mamalane and two nites with Nana. what can i say? i got a popular kid. packing for him was harder than packing for myself. good god, this kid needs a lot o' stuff!

i'm kinda just rambling at this point. i need to get some sleep. it's 10:00 now and our flight is at 6:40am!

how charming of you to say

so i had my charm party. two mommies showed up. S1, Princess, and Mom were there also. though i expected more people, it was perfect. it was still fun and i learned more about another mommy, J. apparently, we went to the same high school (11 years apart, but whatever) , i know her cousins, her cousins were living in my hometown for a while (weird).

i think it was fun. and it was cool watching Princess help S1 and her Nana with jewelry making techniques i had taught her. i think mine came out the cutest, of course. but you wouldn't know this because i forgot to take pictures of everyone else's! i had my camera out and forgot. DOH! i really wish i had remembered. they were all so cute. and the charms were all really cute. they all brought some really cute ones. we had:

• hot red lips
• engagement rings
• various metal hearts
• red "be mine" and "kiss me" hearts
• lock and key charms
• album cover charms
• shrinky dink ipod charms
  
• red/pink/blue heart beads
• and monkey faces (those were mine)

though many people didn't show, i'll do it again. maybe for Halloween. that would be cool! just think of all the charms for Halloween!! next time i'll do an evite, though. invite friends outside the mommy group just so there's a good mix. nothing against the mommy group... i just didn't know that kind of thing was allowed. i know better now.

charmed, i'm sure

so last nite i was up later than i would have liked. 9:45, but still. i like to go to bed with the chickens now a days. since Monkey had a sleepover at his Nana's, i had some time to get things together for the charm party i'm having on Monday. i got all the bracelets put together with heart toggles. sidenote: i really need to start taking more pictures again. because they were really cute with nothing on them. imagine how cute they're going to be AFTER we put all the charms on them! anyhoo, all bracelets ready. all my "bought" charms have jump rings on them. almost everything is ready. almost.

i wanted to do something "special" for the women coming on Monday so i still have a bunch of charms to make. it shouldn't take too too long. but you know how it is when you have a kid under foot and a husband with a list of chores he wants to accomplish... i'm hoping i can do some stuff after he goes down tonight. crossing fingers

i want to make this fun and i think the charms i'm making will help add to that. i imagine, when they see them, they'll say, "ohmigod, how cute! these are SOOOO perfect." at least, that's how it's going down, in my head, right now. so wish me luck tonite and over the weekend, praying i'll be done with everything by Monday, 7pm.

if at first you don't succeed...

might as well give up 'cause he's never gonna sit and watch the damn thing!

i tried sitting with Monkey last nite to play with his little vtech toy he got for Christmas. it says "9mos+" but, COME ON. who are they even kidding with that?? my kid would not sit still for more than two seconds. it doesn't help, the toy has this bright blue on/off button that he'd rather be playing with. or the fact there are new wires coming out of the tv and "ohmigod, where did THOSE wires come from? i haven't seen THOSE wires. i wanna play with THOSE wires!". because partially pulling the dvd player out with the other wires isn't enough for him.

i'm not a bad mom. i'm not a bad mom.

i keep thinking if i repeat it enough, i might actually start believing it.

i feel awful. it's time to look at daycare. i don't want to. i really don't. but he's needing more attention than i'm able to give him, while at work. i would love for him to stay here with me and play all day, but that's just it. he wants to play all day, but he wants me to play with him. which i do, sometimes, but it's not enough. i knew we should have had twins! at least they'd be able to entertain each other. am i right??

so we need options. options that aren't going to bankrupt us, preferably. i've been doing searches in our area, on the Texas Department of Family and Protective Services website, but when i call they're either "not doing child care anymore" or i just don't like the way they sound. there is a neighbor down the street who watches kids, but she keeps "teacher's hours" and i would need to change my hours to make sure i pick him up on time. which, i don't think would be a problem but i'm not sure she has any openings. i'm still waiting for a call back.

wish us luck on this endeavor and ya know, just kinda tell me i'm not a bad mommy when you talk to me next. that'd be great!

one step beyond

he took a step! okay, he took two steps with the same foot and he was kinda going in a circle... does that count?

my Monkey wants to walk really bad. he's standing for longer periods of time now. he's even squatting and getting back up without holding on to anything. he'll be walking by next month, i'm sure. for a while there, i wasn't so sure. he was cruising along like he wanted to walk but then decided he would get there faster if he crawled. my kid's smart like that.

he's still not signing, but then again we're not being real diligent about teaching him. we really need to be. i'm going to see if he'll sit with me after dinner and watch the little "learn and sign" thing Uncle Psycho and Aunt F gave him. because now it's just pissing me off, reading other "mommy" blogs and their kids are signing at 10.5 months. that should be my kid! =)

such talent

he's figured out doors. as in opening and shutting. it's just a matter of time before his poor little fingers get smooshed. =( though, it was kinda cute just watching him open and close the bathroom door while Daddy was in the shower this morning. cool breeze in... cool breeze out. cool breeze in... cool breeze out.

the doors in the office are too heavy right now, but he's getting there. i half shut the conference door this afternoon and he completely bulldozed it with his walker. "nobody keeps Baby out of the conference room!".

in other news, Daddy called this morning to tell me our kid is a klingon. yes, i had to verify whether he meant super clingy or Star Trek ugly thing. one i can handle but if that kid starts leeching onto me it's a whole other story! KIDDING!!

punk rock bather

not his first bath, but definitely his cutest!

he's getting so big and his hair is so long. i don't want him to grow up anymore. =(
these pictures were taken just mere hours before my sweet little monkey turned into son of satan!

we're going thru a phase right now. and it's not a good one. are there ever any good phases? really? anyway, we believe he's gone into his "i'm gonna see if i can keep Mommy and Daddy up all nite and play... or listen to me cry... whatever". it was not a good nite. you'll get more on that when i get more sleep and can type in complete sentences again.

well look who finally got a picture with their baby cousin

Monkey spent the day with Aunt S1 and family. Aunt S1 was about to get her butt kicked when i heard she wanted to put Monkey in the pool. she forgets i can still "take" her skinny ass.

what i wore

as i mentioned, i went and did a little shopping. yesterday, i wore all new stuff and it felt goooood. Target shirt and shoes with JCP perfect jeans.

i gotta admit, i looked good. i felt good. i felt sexy with my big tall shoes. and definitely had better posture. the shoes are going to take some getting used to. the jeans are perfect only because they have a tummy flattener. i didn't know this when i bought them. i just thot they were a little snug and i'd have to lose a little more before putting them on. ha.

and, of course, there's no getting dressed without the yummy tummy! Mamalane got this for me after i delivered. best! present! ever! i was undecided at first because it made me think it was pulling it all in so i didn't have to "suck it in". not so much. but it does help. i've decided i like it and can not live without it.

sleepy time

Will's been sleeping more at nite now. he goes down between 6:30 - 7:30 and doesn't wake up again until between 12 -2. this is awesome for Mommy! not so awesome for Daddy. Daddy's been closing the store, meaning he doesn't get home until after 7:00. last nite, we needed stuff from the store so he went after work. i did everything in my power to keep Monkey up. we played, washed dishes, folded clothes, and even had a bath. he was still out by 7:45. Daddy missed him by 15 minutes.

this morning Daddy had tears in his eyes because he misses play time with Monkey. he was even trying to keep him up to play and all Will wanted to do was sleep. =(

don't worry, Daddy, you'll get all the play time you want this weekend, cuz Momma needs a pedicure!

all is well

Daddy kept baby yesterday. they are both still breathing. all is well.

he had a trip to Academy which i'm sure was a fun adventure out. and he was outside with Daddy when i got home. he was pooped, tho. Daddy didn't follow the schedule so Monkey boy was tired. i got home, fed him and he was out by 6:30. he didn't wake up to feed until 11:30! my boy was tired! of course, after that, it was every two hours and no sleep for Mommy. Daddy got up and took over around 4:00am. thank god for Daddy's!

he's back at work with me today. my boss and coworkers can not believe how good and quiet he is. my boss says if this works out, there's no reason not to keep him with me until i want to put him in some kind of pre-k, or something similar, a couple of days a week. seriously, this is some crazy opportunity! i'm so grateful.

p.s. he finally smiled for Daddy yesterday.

GIVE ME BACK MY FILET-O-FISH

so today is my first day away from the Monkey. i'm doing okay so far, keeping busy with work. i'm just really pissed that i left my phone at home!!! now i'm all freaking out, thinking what if something happens and my mom can't call me and other ridiculous thoughts. she has my work number.. and HM's number and the pediatrician's number. it's just me being a nervous wreck since i can't see him and what he's doing.

mom said he was smiling at her this morning. i know i'm cranky because of the lack of sleep but i can't believe how lucky we are that our baby is such a good baby. he's a happy baby. he's got such a good disposition. very very lucky! knock on wood that it continues.

Mommy misses you, Monkey. kisses.

hi! how ya doin?

i know it's been a while since i've updated... and i really need to post more pics of my kid. but dayum, it's hard! i have a newfound respect for Stay-At-Home-Mom's now, that's for sure. how the hell do they do it??? i was almost losing it the first 3 weeks. i'm okay now. mamalane has come and stayed with us a few nites. and my mom has been over once a week to take care of the middle of the nite feedings. also, my neighbor, Gisella comes over sometimes after she gets off of work. she comes to play with Monkey Boy while i shower or clean or eat. they've all really been a great help.

it's getting better and definitely easier now that i'm getting the hang of things. yes, i can leave his side and he'll be fine. i guess i can also talk on the phone while he's asleep, i just choose not to (i don't want to risk waking him up with my loud self). my usual talk time was in the car (hands-free of course). now that i'm hardly ever in the car, i'm not talking to anyone a whole lot. family and addie, that's about it. i can gather i won't be on the phone much when i get back in the car if Monkey Boy is with me either. to me, that's our time. our personal time. sure, a quick "pick this up" or "on our way home" but not full on conversations. i can't stand to see people on the phone with their kids in the car looking bored out of their minds.

anyway, i'm working on taking more pictures of MB. i'll do my best to put them in my daily photo on flickr. so there's something to look forward to, right?

until next time, i'm sweet t and you're not.